King Of The Hill 13.15 “Serves Me Right For Giving General George S. Patton The Bathroom Key”
First, let us take a moment to recognize the best episode title of the month. See it glisten…and gleeeeeeeam…
It’s been a year since Hank’s father, Cotton, kicked the bucket, but despite Hank having pushed him out of his mind years ago, Cotton isn’t done with his disappointment of a son. While he waits for Cotton’s young wife come to Arlen in order to drop off a box of Cotton’s belongings, Hank realizes that he knows virtually nothing about his own damn father.
“He was a war hero, and he killed 50 men, and…” – Hank
As Bobby doesn’t want this to happen between he and Hank, he sets out a series of questions, but Hank is a bit too busy with Cotton’s box. Why? Because in it is a list of Cotton’s final wishes for Hank to perform, a list easily obtained from pausing Hulu’s feed:
- Give the finger to the bouncer at Juggstore Cowboys
- Spit on the steps of the Japanese Embassy
- Give fork to Bill
- Give perfume to Madame Francine
- Slap the bottoms of the Cleery sisters [two VA nurses]
- Give spat to fatty
When he achieves the final task, he and Peggy are given a key to a bus station locker that holds Cotton’s ashes with one final set of instructions – flush his ashes at a nearby saloon in the toilet that General Patton used right before shipping off. This is a common place to flush ashes, though, and Hank is not allowed to clog up the pipes just because he had a note from his father. Luckily, Bill is in tow, and as a veteran, he turns the saloon’s patrons against each other to declare which war they fought in was better than any other war, allowing Hank access to the toilet. As he looks around the restroom, Hank learns a few more pieces of info about Cotton scrawled on the stall wall, and he is happy to know that, while he may not know much about his father, he knows enough.
(Let’s just ignore the B-story, in which Dale and Bill fight over the concept of a littered aluminum can in relation to their lack of respect for each other, as the argument started with such silliness that I had zero sympathy for either of them as their friendship threatened to fall apart.)
It’s always understandable to want to know more about one’s parents. I personally don’t know nearly as much as I should about my father’s childhood, but it’s not because he’s a closed-off person like Cotton. He just doesn’t talk about it, and I am quite aware that the life he has had since moving to California is far more positive than much of what transpired during his early years on the east coast. But I do hope that, one day, we could have an information sit-down, just for my own sake.
In addition, I had hoped that Hulu would have posted the final fake PSA from the end of the episode on how to avoid clogging toilets, but alas, they weren’t clever enough to turn that into a stand-alone clip.
“Our best bet might be to take out the floorboards and turn this into a Flintstones car.” – Lucky
The Simpsons 20.18 “Father Knows Worst”
Now that Marge has found a sauna and has neither the time nor the energy to worry about anything, Homer steps up to the plate in taking care of the children. Unfortunately, he almost immediately discovers what we all already know — that Bart is a loser and has no future, and that Lisa is a loner and has no friends. And so, Monsieur Simpson does his best to help his two elder children advance in life.
First, he tries to help Bart get a good grade in class by taking on an assigned balsa wood project, but gets in over his head when he chooses to build the nigh impossible Westminster Abbey all by himself, and only learns his lesson after being visited by the ghosts of Geoffrey Chaucer and Oscar Wilde. (True, Simpsons writers, much of Wilde’s platitudes sound good and clever, but many of them don’t make a whole lot of sense sometimes.) And with Lisa, he attempts to get her new friends by updating her on all the cool trends, such as cell phone bedazzling parties on Facebook, but learns his lesson when he sees that his little girl is unhappy.
Of all the shows on Sunday’s Animation Domination, The Simpsons once again is the least funny, which is about halfway a sad commentary on this 20-year-old show and halfway a reminder that this Emmy winner is getting its ass handed to it every now and again. The sweetness that permeates much of this show didn’t seem to come through this week, and that’s a shame.
Good bits from the ep:
- The Commie Swatter
- “Ooooooh! Fire kebab!” — Homer
- The image of Marge riding a stegosaurus on water-skis, and the fact that Homer’s mind would go there in the first place
- “Awwww…that’s not Henry VII; that’s Henry VI.” — Homer
Sit Down, Shut Up 1.2 “Miracle’s Are Real”
Despite popular opinion, I didn’t find this ep as funny as the pilot, but goddamn did I still find myself laughing at the most bizarre instances. I don’t really understand why so many people don’t find this show funny. Are they afraid to laugh at some of the more bizarre bits of humor, like Miracle’s increasingly clothesless dancing and posing in the field while waiting for her birthstar and Pluto to align? Are people too PC to laugh at Happy’s intensely confusing mumbling? I don’t know, but it’s getting me, and it’s getting me goooooood.
When Miracle accidentally gives the entire teaching staff hemlock, the plans for the upcoming “Fair” Fair get thrown out of whack, but Acting Principal Sezno is damned if she can’t raise some money for the school in any way she can. And so the Fair Fair goes into effect only to have it all fall apart in various ways. This is made worse when Larry successfully convinces Miracle that her spirituality is no match for his science, which in turn only successfully turns Miracle into an emotional zombie, depressed and dejected. And so, of course, this has to turn into a parody of that creepy robot fortune teller in Big, a quest for Ennis to see Miracle’s breasts in any way he can, for Willard to find a home (one that’s not inside of an active church bell) and for Stuart to revert back to his former job as a prison clown (complete with song).
At this point, I don’t know if the show’s going to get any better for those who simply don’t get it, but I also don’t want to scare people off of checking out the rest of the short first season. Just open yourself up to the silliness and subversion, and understand that there are several layers of humor going on at one time instead of the assumed one level (you know, like Two and a Half Men, which is pretty much just bad sex puns). It’s true that it’s hard to relate to any character so far, but I like the general group overall. And isn’t that a good starting point?
Other stuff I laughed at:
- The interestingly punctuated Teacher’s’ Lounge
- “Boy, the man cannot hold his hemlock.” — Larry re: Ennis
- “I only heard five bongs and a scream.” — Miracle
- “Lift your head. I can’t see your chesticles!” — Ennis
Family Guy 7.13 “Stew-Roids”
Aside from the depressing fact that Joe’s son Kevin just happened to randomly die in Iraq while he was gone from the show over the last few seasons, and FG‘s continual insistence that killing pets is funny (IT’S NOT, YOU JACKASSES!), this was the second almost drop-down funny episode of Family Guy in a row. While Chris gets She’s All That-ed by the popular Connie, which in turn puts Meg into an even lower social standing at James Woods High School, Stewie decides to pump up his muscles when Joe’s infant daughter beats the crap out of him. Unfortunately, this leads almost immediately into steroids, which gives the show’s writers every opportunity they can to use every single musclehead cliché they could think of. I hate to say that most of it was funny simply because it was true, and that it was coming out of a baby’s mouth, but sometimes that’s all it needs to elicit a guffaw from yours truly.
True, it’s tough to get a laugh for doing a Buffalo-Bill-in-Silence-Of-The-Lambs bit with Chris when Kevin Smith beat you by three years, but you can always make up for that by having Stewie, huge muscles newly deflating, using his muscle flaps as wings to parody Rocky the Flying Squirrel. It’s the silly things in life, folks.
Other guffaw-eliciting yokes:
- Meg’s bag lunch: bread crust, an orange peel and a picture of Lois eating a turkey leg
- “You look like Lou Ferrigno’s poop.” — Brian
- Paul Sorvino and Chazz Palminteri starring in the film Distracting Trumpet
- “I like what you’re doing with your boobs.” — Peter
American Dad 4.17 “Every Which Way But Lose”
Another Steve-centric episode, another mild success. When Steve, as he often does, wants to spend more time with his dad, he joins the football team and have his dad coach, only to suck major hairy balls and get cut from the team. And so, with Roger’s help (and Roger’s disguise as Coach Buttermaker in The Bad News Bears), Steve and his ragtag group of misfits train in order to take on the undefeatable Wolverines and finally get Stan to cry. (Because how many times has Stan gotten Roger and Steve to cry? Too often.) They stink out loud as a team, though, and so Steve and Roger figure they can at least prove themselves by “spoiling” the game and winning on their own terms. Unfortunately, when Stan finally loses the match, he feels he has no other choice but to commit suicide. (As he is unable to cry, this is the only way he knows to deal with shame, or as called it, getting the emotions out through his throat.) But Steve is a perpetual loser, and so he is able to teach Stan to finally cry.
“That’s what life is — losing and crying.” — Steve
Meanwhile, Francine is hard at work baking pies for the upcoming fair, only to find that the mysterious woman she keeps losing to is actually Hayley in disguise, betraying her confused notions of feminism in the 21st century. (“Mom, it’s not what you think. I’m…cooking meth!”) This plot doesn’t really give too much other than having Roger describe how awful each pie is. (I believe I heard something about gerbil meat.) The storyline does, as it does on AD, end quite suddenly and with a one-word wrap-up, though, when Roger wins the competition and admits that he’s been competing against them secretly for years.
Not one of AD‘s best, but a solid effort.
Bits! Funny! Here!:
- “Dad, you can’t really expect a non-Korean to place above ‘cobalt.’” — Steve on his platinum medal at a recent chemistry competition
- “A sturdy groin is the lynchpin of victory.” — Stan
- “Yes, I’m crying! He hit me with a chair!” — Roger
- “Hey Steve, before the game, how many ears did you have?” — Roger